10 Signs You Are a Twin-Daddy

From the Twin-Daddy:

You know you are a twin-daddy when:

The Family Dinner

• You make certain to use the bathroom at work because you may not have time at home.
• You have the “baby sway” and will rock any object, anywhere, anytime to make it sleep.
• You can open a childproof medicine cap one-handed.
• You can feed a baby, read a book, and rock the other baby with your foot at the same time.
• You typically reheat your coffee more than twice.
• Any watching of television occurs while pinned to the sofa by sleeping babies.  If you can’t reach the remote, you could end up trapped watching America’s Top Model.  After several months, you may actually enjoy it.

Even Shakti has babysitting duties

• At the end of every day, you have a collection of baby drool on your shoulder and chest.
• You count a day without getting peed or pooped on as a pretty good day.  If you only got peed on, really… that’s still fairly good.
• In order to get at your dinner while it is warm, you eat with a child strapped to you in the baby bjorn carrier keeping the plate over his head so you don’t get crumbs on him.
• You walk in on your wife singing a song and the lyrics are, “You have explosive poop!”